You’re aware of ADHD but might still feel weighed down by self-judgment, past experiences, and the pressure to “just try harder.” Maybe you keep slipping into old habits, or you wonder if you’ll ever be consistent.

Many ADHDers internalise their struggles as personal failures, believing they should be able to keep up with neurotypical expectations. It feeling like chronic impostor syndrome. The problem isn’t that you’re failing, it’s that the world wasn’t designed for ADHD brains.

The Mask & The Mirror Exercise

To surface internalised beliefs, challenge shame-based narratives, and begin separating identity from masking and productivity driven worth.

What you’ll need

How to get started

The Mask

Write or draw what you feel you show the world, especially in settings where you feel pressure to perform, fit in, or hold it together. You can write, draw, or even create a kind of character sketch of your masked self.

Prompts to help

• What behaviours, traits or habits do you use to pass or mask?

• What do others think I am good at that actually costs me a lot of energy?

• What am I hiding because I fear it will be judged?

The Mirror

Write or draw your truth, the version of you that feels most real, safe, or at ease, even if you don’t often show it. Use curiosity here and not judgement. You might not fully know who you are under the mask yet this part is about wondering, not fixing.

Prompts to help

• When do I feel most like myself?

• What do I wish people knew about what it’s like to be me?

• What strengths do I only see when I stop performing?

Reflect

Now look at both the mask and the mirror and ask…

• Where is the biggest gap between the mask and the mirror?

• Which parts of my real self would I like to show more often?

• What’s one small way I can let go of a mask today? (I encourage you to make this a tiny thing and choose a safe place to experiment)

Connect (Optional element)

Take a small object (a pebble, token, keyring, anything you like).

Hold it while reflecting on your mirror self. Let it be a tactile reminder of the truest self. You might carry it with you, or place it somewhere visible.

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